Irony is the best medicine.

few people can experience in their life times what im experiencing right now. the left butt is on a painkiller induced la la land trip, while right butt has no clue whatsover. so when i walk, things alternate between sensation and no sensation. like the butt (punster, funster) of a very obscene joke. so without further ado, i shall launch into how these things came to be.
i blame it solely on Oprah.
she flaunted this theory of substituting muscle for flab ,yada yada , long story, and which resulted in me lifting weights and i prolly lifted a little too much and i ended up with terrible back spasm. i thought it will pass in a few days, and heck a lil pain is nothing compared to what i shall experience bearing quadruplets, so good training and stuff. yes i know one day i shall end up writing a sucessful self help book , about turning negtives into positives and such. finally the pain was unbearable and i had to see the doctor.
i was adamant that i wanted to see a female orthpedician only, i didnt want some guy to fondle with my back, especially after my lecherous knee doctor. but as the receptionist at the hospital put it, " madam, if you want a female orthopedician, you'll have to leave the country!". pig!!. anyhow. my dad reassured me he'd blow the doctor to the moon if he tried anything hanky panky. and so we chose the oldest geriatric doctor available.
when the doctor heard that it was a gym mishap, he burst into peals of laughter,. bag of bones, enjoying himself goes, " you want muscles to become a female wrestler?" ho ho ho hahahahahahahahahha heheheheheheheheheheh hoah hoah hoah tsk tsk tsk. after a lot of needless mirth, he asked me what the need for weights was?. i can wax eloquence on a lot of things, but infront of a doctor who was laughing so uncouthly, i lost my confidence and said, lamely " ironically, it was a back strengthening exercise". hohohohohohoho hahahahahahahahahahahha hehehehehehehehehehhehe hoah hoah hoah hoah tsk tsk tsk and whole bit of phlegm ratteling also.
finallly, after he wiped his tears, he wrote me a painkiller, which a mallu nurse expediently administered to me. in the left butt which is now in lalala land, while the other is rather befuddled by all the fuss.
anyhow, part 2 of my magnum opus will be a little late in coming. my back is still weak and when the back is raring to go for a spot of strengthening exercises, ill get around to it.