The True Indian Idol

It's hard not be affected by the current festive season when you're in a place like pune. Maharashtra loves, nay LOVES lord Ganesha. That's truth apparent, going by the numerous pandals in this place, infact the street I live on has 6 big pandals. All this is new to me and I look upon with wondrous eyes, as in the place from where I come from, Ganesh Chaturthi begins and ends on the same day.Indeed the other day, when somebody was talking about the traffic jams caused by "Visarjans" I was like, "Oh C'mon, you've only got to bear it for a day" (*make a sound here for getting a fact soo wrong*)

No, here in pune, Ganesh Chaturthi is the baap of all festivals (That's me trying to be local, in days to come, I promise to infuse my "writings" with the local flavour). I don't know how the system works but everyone who is anyone puts up a pandal. Infact the biggest pandal on my street is sponsored by a political party and there's even a booming audio that lists all the top brass of the party, Lord Ganesh too is mentioned somewhere and after that, the whole thing flashes with 70's disco lighting, that, oddly reminded me of Mithun Chakravarthy numbers. Then Ofcourse there is the Music. If you are not belting out the latest dance number, you are not a true pandal it seems. Yeah there are the devotional songs and stuff but one seriously needs good music to work the crowds. I swear, I heard a pandal playing Kevin Little's "Turn me on" and this song has lyrics that go - "And then she said to me Boy just push that thing Push it harder back on me" - makes you wonder no??


But really its all nice. Festive season always makes me happy. There are bright lights everywhere, good discount in stores, people too are generally happier and less snarly and overall the mood is generally cheerful. Infact, the mood it seems has even crept into your ATMs. Yes, I kid you not, my atm had a full fledged pandal thing going - sans the music and the lighting ofcourse (see below). Get cash, do puja, get out.

I do love the times we live in. Its sooo much more amusing.


P.S: The photo above was clicked by my friend sim who was slightly amused that I'd want to put it on my blog.

And they say this blog is "Self Obsessed"

I'll try for this not to be a rant. I said "t-r-y"

But what is it with the world and my name?? Everytime I tell anybody my name they look at me with utter befuddlement, with a look that says "Are you serious??". If I'm on the phone and I tell my name, there's this obvious pregnant pause at the other end and I know that the person is taking time to process the whole name, as if I'd said something like "Anastasia Chavetdatze".

I've had it with this behaviour. The other day I was on the phone with a vendor and I told her my name and she was like "Really? what does it mean?". That's another thing, the pregnant pause is always followed by the meaning of my name. I've not heard anybody asking anybody else for the meaning of their names. I don't ask anybody for the meaning of their names, but nooooo, when its me, they all want to know what it means and then there's the third step in "the Philosophy of my name" - The contradicting of the meaning. Its not hope but Doubt.

There was this incident (actually there are serveral, but we'll run with this as example) where my teacher and mam argued about my name, when dear old mam had come in to collect the report card. It wasn't pretty.

T: About your daughter's name, Its wrong, how can you call her doubt?
Mam (quite coldly): Its not doubt, its Hope
T: Ofcourse not, its mean doubt, there's no doubt about it hahahahahha
Mam (now positively glowering): I think as mother, I know better
T: Its still not too late to change her name. You could perhaps change it to "Akanksha" Thats not too bad.
Mam: Its still not too late to change your name either

Yeah, Go Mam!!! but I knew I wasn't gonna top the class anytime too soon.

Sigh, there are times I've wished my mother had given me a no brainer bollywood-esque name like Tania or riya. Has anybody asked a Tania what her name means? ofcourse not, it means shit and everyone knows it. I've gone to mam and complained about it and she feels kinda guilty too. She collects evidence of my name and scours the internet for my rare namesakes. There was this incident at frankfurt airport, where upon telling my name, the guy I was a making random conversation with said "oh! doesn't it mean hope?", I could have jumped over the table and kissed him for saying that. Suddenly, my existence was legitemized. I felt normal. and when I told mam about it, she wanted to kiss him too.

What snapped within me was yesterday. 4 complete strangers, at pragati maidan, spoilt delhi brats all, laughing upon hearing my name and making fun of it infront of me. Them being spoilt brats was incidental. It was everybody. Teachers, Classmates, Peers, Bosses, colleauges, everybody has done it. Made fun of it. Purposely made a mess of prouncing it wrong.They don't know that by doing it, by questioning my name, they are not only mocking mocking me but also mocking the two people who gave me the name and its just not done.

So, Fuck you all. There I've said it. FUCK YOU. If you think you know better

Yay Me!!!

Well six months ago I did something unfathomable. well unfathomable to most people who do not know me. I moved to another city, to live by myself, to be independant, to fry my own bacon as it were (ok that sounded corny) and here I am six months hence, in an apartment of my own, in a city thats less alien and more friendly, my own TV, my own bloody land line even, did I say I'm sooo proud of me?

When I first moved, everybody, asked me if I was crazy to move. I mean even people in poona asked me why I did it. Well the truth be told, i don't know why. Its something that I felt ought to be done. To challenge myself. to see if I could do it. It's hard to explain and most often I end up shrugging my shoulders and looking like an idiot, but I'm glad I did it. With minimum meltdowns too. 2 to be exact but thats a decent figure methinks.

there are the highs. Oh my god the highs. Its hard to describe but even little things like instant coffee can give you joy when the universe seems against you. there are so many frustrating moments and even more frustrating people to deal with and then something comes along that makes it all easy, like a sweep of a magic wand.I mean I could almost make love to the guy who invented instant coffee. especially Bru cappucino. Hindustan Lever. I soooo love you dudes. Open packet, hot water and voila, cinnamon cappucino. who da thunk? now if only someone came up with instant tea, my life will be complete.

Then there are the tiny victories. the little come uppances that make you feel like a diva with her own entourage of backups. There was this one time where I was faced with boiling water in my bathroom because the bathroom was the only place in the house that had a 15 A plug. I didn't know that it was a 15 A plug that I needed. So I went to an electric store and asked for a "big" plug and they all snickered there. They almost sold me a 300 ruppee extension cable set but you know what, I was sure that there would be a 5 A to 15A plug, and there was! and it costs only 30 bucks!!. Now my electric kettle sings happily in the kitchen.

Did I tell you about my broadband story. This story is soo hugee, it deserves a paragraph to itself. Ok first some background - I had a lousy wireless connection that was painfully slow and I almost never got the signal. I mean I used to walk around the house with the laptop on my head looking for a spot with strong signal. Since obviously thats just too much effort to get on to the internet, I decided to go in for a broadband connection. The only hitch was that the society that I lived in did not allow broadband connection on the premises. I called every broadband vendor and everytime I told my society name, they would all refuse flatly. So I went to reason with the society president, but he just refused to give permission. His reasoning - All the wires would make the premises messy. So did I take it lying down? Did I start to look for another house in another more frendly society? Ofcourse not. What I want, I always get. So I approached the society president, this time armed with the most potent of all weapons : emotional blackmail.

I told the guy my parents lived in australia and that I had to talk to them everyday since I was a girl alone in this bad bad city, I needed the broadband and before I knew it huge sobs were pouring down my face. "As if this life wasn't tough, you want to make it more tough?" I asked in between sobs. Well anyway tears do work cause I got the broadband permission after that! That victory was soo sweet, the "whos your daddy bitches!!" moment, ahh simply priceless. And thanks to me 6 houses in my building also got broadband connection. Airtel so owes me!!

So, inshallah, its been a fun 6 months. I've made friends and proved to myself that I can make friends when I want to. The life that I've built in the last 6 months is expressly my doing and that, is the sweetest of all victories.