Time to turn back and descend the stair

Last day of the year, last night actually and I'm here, tired but happy, in my jammies. No major plans to ring in the new year, no major parties and no annoying confetti that gets stuck in your hair. I spent the whole day today at Universal Orlando theme park and had a sooper fun day. I'm tired as hell because I spent the whole day walking around the massive park, especially the Harry Potter theme park - doing the rides and waiting in abominably long queues. I have to say, as a maniacal Potter fan, the Harry Potter Theme Park at Orlando is awesome! They replicated Hogwarts, Hogsmead and Diagon Alley. We, my friend, her mother and I,went around drinking butter beer and eating sweets from, Honeydukes, the sweet shop. My favorite "ride" of the park was the "Forbidden Journey" ride, which took us through the Hogwarts castle, and finally culminated in a roller coaster ride to simulate what flying on a broom felt like. Seriously awesome! So thats why we are too tired to go out and preferred to chill at home instead.

Instead of reviewing the year that has gone by, I've instead decided to revisit some memorable events - good and bad in 2010

I really enjoyed the Improv class I took in Jan. This came right after a brooding winter break and it managed to draw me out emotionally. It was so much fun and lighthearted. Also, it gave me the opportunity to let my hair down and just live in the moment. My improv team put up a show at the end of the class and I couldn't believe that was me, being silly and not being too conscious about it. Good Fun!

I traveled quite a bit this year, and although I didn't write about it extensively, my favourite trip this year was to Belgium and Netherlands with my best friend since school, Amrita. We had a rocking girls trip to Amsterdam but my favourite memory of the trip was us going clubbing on my last day and getting mad drunk. I still remember us being in that cab, at 4 am, on the way to her apartment, and Amrita went "You need to blog more. Promise me!" I told her I loved her and promptly passed out. Everytime I hit "Publish" on my blogposts now, I see her, in my minds eye, nodding her head in approval. Love you babe!

I also went home to India in May primarily because it was my Dad's 60th birthday and we planned to throw him a surprise party. I was really excited about going back because I imagined the reception I would get. Mom would smother me with embarrassing affection I thought and might possibly cry at the airport itself. When I did arrive, at 2 am in the night, to my unpleasant surprise, NO ONE came to receive me. They had forgotten!! I called them, from a pay phone at the airport and they woke up and went "Oh!" I waited after that for an hour, during which time, the airport security guard, took pity on me and commented that studying in the US didn't necessarily warrant for special treatment (!!!!) I was upset, primarily because, my brother, when he came home from Australia, always got the full blown airport reception.I felt cheated! Anyway, after that my parents spent the remaining four weeks being extra nice to me to make up for not being at the Airport. Dad also gave me access to his fully stocked bar, so basically, things brightened up considerably :)

I was in Delaware for the summer for my internship. This needed me to drive from Durham to Delaware in June. I had NEVER driven before coming to the US so I found the thought of driving 400 miles absolutely daunting. I remember starting out at 8 am in sheer nervousness and then gradually settling into the ride. At lunch, I dropped in to a MacDonald's outlet for the first time ever in the US and found that I couldn't decipher the menu. Give me my McAloo Tikki anyday, I said, quietly to myself. After lunch, I drove for 3 hours straight and reached Delaware.This was a huge milestone for me because I felt like I achieved something. It felt like I had broken the shackles and become really independent. All my life I had either been driven around or relied on public transport. Driving such a long distance, made me feel strong and confident. Yay!

As I blogged before, my birthday came during Finals week and so I had two finals on my birthday. Inspite of that people turned up for my birthday soiree, which really meant a lot to me. But the gesture that did it was, Fida, the proprietress, of Saladelia, giving me a Tiramisu Cake for my birthday. She said that she knew how it felt to spend a birthday without your family (say awwww). The kindness of strangers continues to astound me and reminds me that a little kindness goes a long way.

In Year 2 of school, I consciously decided to cook more. I not only baked more but also got into the habit of cooking Indian food more. My biggest culinary feat was cooking for dinner party of 6 in December. I couldn't believe how grown up I'd become! and I couldn't believe people were eating my food and saying it was delicious. I was relieved to know that the cooking gene that runs in my family had not by passed me. I agree that I might have drwan the shorter straw in this area because my Mom, Dad and brother are brilliant cooks but I'm not so bad myself.

2010 was certainly eventful. It felt like I took two steps forward and one back. It was a roller coaster of a year. Here's hoping that the next year will be a much happier and joyous one for you and me.

Happy New Year!

There's no sunshine when its gone

Let me be absolutely honest and say that when it comes to cricket, I'm not the most ardent Indian cricket fan one could hope to find. I don't remember memorable match plays, I don't obsess over our victories or losses, hell I'm not even up to speed with the composition of the Indian team sometimes. But, whatever, my level of affiliation, Cricket has always been a part of my life - it was for the past 26 years atleast - through its ubiquitous presence on TVs, Newspapers and Dinner table discussions.

It was hard to be oblivious to it because I had an older brother who was absolutely obsessed with it. So obsessed that I think he secretly harboured notions of being a cricketer one day. Well, not so secret because my brother actually played cricket inside the house and how he managed not to break anything, or send the food tray flying, still makes me wonder. Given this, I had no choice but to give in and let our TV be dominated by Cricket. And gradually, I found myself actually watching Cricket -out of my own volition.

My first memory of cricket, or rather my favourite first memory of cricket was the 1992 World cup in Australia & New Zealand. The cricket stadiums were picturesque and breadthtaking, while the cricket threw up some outlandish surprises -like New Zealand topping the league.I still remember my father's wonder in NZ looking invincible. "They have more sheep" he said. South Africa, coming back into the international arena looked like the only formidable opposition to NZ and there were loud murmurs of our own boy wonder -Sachin Tendulkar. He was a phenomenon no more, but the anointed son who would save Indian Cricket. Anybody who could stand up to Merv Hughes and his ilk was surely, that? When I look back, I think the 1992 world cup was instrumental in burgeoning my love for cricket. It showed me the power of the under dog (insert Pak reference here), the perils of being cocky (Australia as always), the vagaries of chance (Duckworth -Lewis system) and the heartbreak of defeat (South Africa's loss in the Semis). I think that world cup reeled me into the world of Cricket for good.

I sort of consider myself lucky that I saw India's ascendancy in cricket while I was growing up and that I got to see Sachin Tendulkar's career. On hindsight, they both are highly co-related methinks. For me atleast, the glory years of Indian cricket were from 1996 - 2005. Well, 2005 was the year I graduated college and the last year I followed cricket doggedly. I remember the 1996 world cup hosted my India vividly. Expectations were higher than the 1992 world cup and after we defeated Pakistan in Bangalore, thanks to Venkatesh Prasad's epic dimissal of Aamir Sohail, all of us were sure that we were going to clinch it. In school (my conservative methodist all girls school), they even started broadcasting the cricket commentary over the intercom!! such was the mania. Sadly, we lost, uncomprehendingly, to Sri Lanka, the eventual winners. That for me was the beginning of Indian Cricket's See-Saw era. The team would give us giddying wins and immediately, with the next match infact, plunge us into despair with soul shattering losses. The words "inconsistent" and "lack of killer instinct" got bandied about regularly.

My favourite cricket memory is undoubtedly the 1999 world cup and the India Vs Sri Lanka match. That day is etched in my memory because two new gems, Dravid and Ganguly, schooled Sri Lanka and my board exam results were also announced on the same day. I couldn't veer myself away from the TV to even see how I did in what I thought were my seminal exams. I actually asked a friend to see my results at school. She didn't get back to me and so I had to, ask the brother to drive me to school. He cursed me and the school board for taking him away from that brilliant match play. He didn't forgive me even when he became the brother of the school topper. He still cursed me. That day was a great day.

As an Indian cricket fan, you got used to the dizzying heights and the abysmal lows. You became a tempered soul that never rejoiced too much, like when they won the Natwest Trophy against England. You knew that it wouldn't be long before they lost to lowly Bangladesh. You became one who could meet with triumph and disaster and treat those two imposters just the same.This also became your philosophical point of view. It did become mine. I never got too excited by my own personal successes and not too disappointed by my failures. When the team lost several series in succession, you learned to have faith and believe and were rewarded with an outstanding series win. The Indian team showed you that to have a heart was also a great thing. I can remember so many innings were there was a lone Indian batsman who showed heart and stood up to wild inswinging bowling while his team collapsed around him. Being an Indian cricket fan taught you valuable life lessons. It taught you the value of patience, of lessons in failure, of not being swayed by success, of celebrating little things like glorious stroke play and not being focused on the result itself.

I can't remember when exactly, but gradually Indian cricket started weaning itself away from Sachin Tendulkar and the Fab Four. I remember feeling a twinge of sadness when India started winning matches without a significant contribution from Sachin. The infusion of the younger brigade made the Indian team a lot more resilient and hardy. Cricket also became incredibly commercialized. The tours became numerous and the formats became confusing. That monstrosity called T20 made its presence and for me it became cricket overdose.Thats when I exited out of viewing cricket but not following it.

Inexplicably, my favourite format is the Test format of cricket. I love test matches more than anything and I find it annoying when people ask me how a game could last for 5 days. Test match for me is the epitome of cricket and incorporates strategy, patience and sublime technique. Its the unhurried version. A version where you'll see the purest of pure cover drives, one that might come 2 hours into an innings but will be totally worth the wait. I mentally ready my Decembers to be inundated with Test cricket. I always look forward to test cricket in Australia as the year end treat. Nothing compares to watching a test match played on lush green outfields, in brilliant sunny weather and with raucous fans with the most outrageous banners/signs. An overseas Indian test match victory for me is more memorable than ODI victories because a test match match victory is hard earned, more laboured and less subject to vagaries of chance.

I will never forget our Test match victory against Australia in Perth. in PERTH. I remember jumping in glee when we won because we had done it. Broken our overseas jinx and achieved a win at Perth, the bounciest mofo of a pitch. I remember how commentators analyzed and dissected the victory, I read reams written about the victory, saw TV debates on whether that was the greatest Cricket team India had ever produced and I remember my brother's excited voice. The rest of the tour was bloody brilliant too. We won the ODI series and defeated Australia in Australia.

Being in the US, I miss cricket. I miss not finding it on my TV as I channel surf, I miss post-match analysis and even, dare I say it, the excited-flawed commentary of Charu Sharma. I hate reading live match plays on websites and imagining what the shot might have been. Most of all I miss watching it with my family. How I'd pace like a restless animal when a match got tense, while my brother and Dad watched with searing concentration. My mother, an ardent fan too, would talk annoyingly and give her take on what the team should do next. The three of us, my brother, Dad and I, would catch each other's eye and have the same thought -If they made Mom the coach of the Indian cricket, that would indeed be the day.

After India's spectacular win in Durban yesterday, missing these Cricket moments makes me realize that not being able to watch cricket is a form of home sickness too. Sad that.

Dispatches from Cairo

I know this post on my Egypt trip comes a bit late, but I always feel like its necessary to summarize a trip - revel in the good memories, go EGAD!! at the unpleasant ones and make general tourist mental notes.

Tourist mental notes are observations that are priceless, that stick with you long after the trip is over - sort of like a sweet aftertaste. So here goes my list of notes. Also, I've put down my list favourite things to do in Egypt at the bottom.

1. First impression of Cairo happens when you are about to land - The whole city looks like its being excavated from the sand. It looks ancient and reverent. Actually the ancientness of the land permeates through whole of Egypt and it feels special to see sights that are older than time itself.

2. Egypt is a well oiled tourist machinery.The moment you land, chances are you'll find yourself in the warm embrace of your tourist guide who'll not only pick you up from the airport but will also chaperon you around all the sites.Yes, they will even accompany you to the sound and light show, because for some reason, they think you are not capable of comprehending a sound and light show without their "insights."

Well you may think that you could do without a guided tour, but sorry, you'll go crying back to a tourist agency because the entire tourist machinery is so strong that it is quite difficult to get around without one.

3. Egyptians love football. You will see it and hear it everywhere and whenever Football is on, the former is way more important than you, the tourist. So if your tour guide disappears to see a match. Suck it!

4. Seeing Cairo brought me flashbacks of the "English Patient." Both, the book and the movie. When we visited the museum of antiquities, with its giant marble staircases, I could imagine the place being the capital of excitement thanks to all the excavations. Yeah those archaeologists really dug Egypt. (pun intended)

5. That ancient Egyptians obsessed over their afterlife clearly can be gleaned after your visit to the Great pyramids. Surely, anybody who spends 20 years to plan life after death, deserves to be called obsessive. We also learned that ancient Egyptians packed their tombs with gold, clothes and furniture. Yes, furniture!!

6. Egyptians love Indians. Atleast, they say they do or it might be a tactic to get your money by making you feel you're special because you're Indian. When they see you, their Pavlovian response is "Amitabh Bachan." I. Have. No. Idea. Why. Everywhere we went, when traders/cab drivers/policemen saw us, they said "Amitabh Bachan." I dunno what that dude did, but he has mesmerized them Egyptians and they actually do get mad when you tell them that Amitabh Bachan is Old. like really Old. and is peddling AAA batteries on TV.

7. They may love Indians but they love bargaining even more. and boy are they stellar at that or what. I thought I was the master bargainer, but Egyptian traders made me work so hard for every item, that at the end I would have given anything to not bargain. So here's how the S.O.P went:

First they'll quote you an outrageous price - this is primarily to see what your counter offer is. Then you haggle. Then they'll halt the proceedings by offering you tea. Then they ask you questions on awkward topics like dating scene in India and premarital sex while you're drinking tea. You choke on the aforementioned tea and nearly die. You contemplate that a 30 Egyptian pound scarf is not worth dying over and so you halt proceedings, tell the trader that you agree to his price and walk out. with a scalded tongue. and ego. and scarf.

8. NO scarf is worth dying over. One should never have an ego about things when one is bargaining. Helps you walk away easily. Biggest lesson learned.

9. Don't take a Negotiations class in B-school. Bargaining in a souk will teach you that

10. Egyptians hate miserly tippers. Everybody here expects a tip for something or the other. The bulk of my expense was spent in tips. So I pulled the student card and explained why I'm a miserly tipper. So now they hate students more than miserly tippers.

11. My favourite memory is hearing the call to prayers. Its a sound so reverent, that it makes you pause and reflect.

12. Egypt has so many sites and so much history but one gets the feeling that there is not much pride in that history. Most Egyptians view the Pharoanic sites as a part of their pagan history and have sadly distanced themselves from it, given that it goes against Islamic tenets.

13. My other favourite memory was cruising down the Nile, docking at villages, visiting magnificent, ancient ruins and getting a history lesson. As a history buff, there is no bigger treat than Egypt.

14. I still can't fathom how erudite and knowledgeable ancient Egyptians were to build the things that they did and to leave the legacy that they did. Makes you realise that the human race is capable of great things if it puts its mind to it.

15. The single biggest reason I love travel is the insight it provides into people's lives. By eating the food they eat, learning about the lives they lead, their pet peeves and must do's, you get an exquisite peek into a life that you may never lead, but one that sure looks like a lot of fun.

My Favourite Things to do in Egypt:

1. Climbing inside the great pyramid of Giza.

2. Seeing the Christian quarter of old Cairo. Cairo infact has numerous ancient churches and it was quite revealing to see both Islam and Christianity co-exist in Egypt.

3. Seeing the original copy of "The Psalms" at the Coptic museum. This was a seminal moment for me as the book of psalms is my favourite biblical text.

4. Drinking Mint Tea and eating Kusheri, a yummy rice dish at the 14th Century Khan-El-Khalili Souk Market.

5. Visiting the Aswan High dam in Aswan. The dam is a construction marvel.

6. Visiting the Philae temple behind the Aswan dam. The Temple was carefully restored, piece by piece, on an island, after the original site was submerged due to the building of the dam.

7. Cruising down the Nile and stopping at small villages to visit ancient ruins. My favourite site has to be the magnificent EDFU temple. My jaws dropped when I first saw the 140 mts high entrance.

8. The valley of the Kings in Luxor and the magnificent paintings inside the tombs, including king Tutan Khamen.

9. Exploring the huge site of the Karnak temple at Luxor. It was the most important temple in ancient times and is a must visit for everybody.

10. Bargaining in Egyptian souks - taking in the myriad colours and scents

raison d'etre

So today, while I was in a frozen yogurt shop in Orlando called "Delish Frogen Yozurt," slurrping at my red velvet yogurt, I heard the most mellifluous voice one could hope to hear. I was surprised and could almost not believe that it was Dame Kiri Te Kanawa, singing Ave Maria, on the radio. I don't know if I should be sad or thrilled that "Ave Maria" has been relegated to that genre called "Christmas Music."

Ave Maria is special to me. Very very special. Ave Maria was the reason I fell in love with Opera. I first heard Andre Bocelli's version of Ave Maria on his album "The Sacred Arias." This album was a birthday gift from my once-best-friend-forever on my 17th birthday. It was a tape. I vividly remember calling it a night on my birthday, tucking myself in with my Walkman. Ave Maria was the first track on this tape and the moment I heard it, I think I experienced divinity. It made my soul soar and made me cry. It made me want to be a better human being. I had honestly felt nothing like it before. Thats why it is so special to me and thats why hearing it in a yogurt shop made me wee bit sad. But then again, if somebody else, heard it on the radio and felt what I did, it was probably a good thing.

Listening to it again, this time in the voice of Dame Kiri, took me back to that time in my life where I discovered so much music. I discovered Opera, Western Classical and Classic Rock when I was around 16-17. Every new genre was a revelation. A celebration of how much life had to offer. I miss that sorely these days. I miss being driven by intellectual curiosity actually. I miss reading voraciously and learning about the world. And all because I have commercial and not intellectual pursuits. sigh.

I was one of the very few people who absolutely loved school. I loved learning, giving exams and then moving into a higher class to learn some more. I thrived in that environment and was quite sad when it all ended when I completed engineering. What I liked most that I could clearly see an evolution in my intellect from one class to the next. Once I started working, it became harder to gauge if I grew as a human being. True, I gained valuable experience, but I could not clearly determine if I had become smarter or more worldly. Thats why I clung on to my reading habit. I viewed it as the only thing that would save my intellect from being stunted. I honestly believe that the more you know, the more you learn, the more empathetic you become. The more humane you become. That is kind of a big deal no?

I know I'm meandering a bit but listening to a beautiful opera piece, a piece I first heard as a seventeen year old, made me realize that I've not experienced the joy of discovering something seminal in a long time. I miss reading books that changed my world view, or music that stopped me in my tracks. I hate that those moments are fewer and far between.

Yeah, being a grown up sucks!

Proximity

I feel like I'm blind-folded,

groping in the dark,

searching for you and

that you're right in front of me

teasing.

Breathe and make yourself known.

In the cradle of civilization

So, the upshot of the things are that I'm in Cairo and blogging with all my blogger tabs in Arabic. I can just about make out the "Publish" button.

I'm here with my parents on a family vacation after about 5 years. Last time we went on a vacation, we got caught in a terrorist attack, this time hopefully, it will be less eventful.

Love Cairo so far. Managed to see the Egyptian Museum of Antiquities, the Pyramids of Giza and the sphinx! Climbing inside the great pyramid will easily count as one of my most memorable travel experiences! It was completely dark, unlit - felt like you were going into the nether region. We literally had to crawl forwards on all fours because of the low ceiling. You realize how much fun it must have been to be an archeologist discovering these pyramids.

I also loved the museum. The collection of egyptian antiquities is enormous. Scratch that. Ginormous. never seen anything quite like it. It was apparently setup in 1902 and was the first building in the world setup solely as a museum! walking up the marble stairs through the giant doors, one could imagine archeologists and egyptologists in the 1930s strutting around in excitement.

Our guide, was great and gave my family a full political download of Egypt as well as the history of egypt. Its hard to believe how exceedingly sophisticated and intelligent ancient egyptians were. Like ancient sites at Mohenjodaro and Harappa, Egypt displayed an extremely superior sense of architecture and civilization.

So my take away from the whole day was the while most people's ancestors where still swinging from the trees, these people where building pyramids. Incredible that!

Where Karma Fights Back

Due to certain events in the recent past, namely my laptop hemorrhaging on me and that my passport is still stuck in a certain embassy when I'm due to fly out on Saturday, I've come to believe in the powers of Karma's retribution.

Aditya Jalan, my trivia team mate in college and the awesome one-third of team tonic, once told me, that I had the "The Karma of a loud kettle in Buddhist Monastery." That statement was epic and it stuck with me because all of a sudden the events in my life made sense. He also said that HIS karma was that of a "curtain in a bhuddist monastery." and abhishek's (the final -third of team tonic) karma was that "of a well fed cat in a bhuddist monastery." The latter is definitely true. He is certainly well fed.

But coming back to my tryst with karma, I'll tell you why that statement makes sense.

1. For some reason, in this life I'm obsessed with Kettles. I like the way it looks and feels. When I'm at a Williams -Sonoma store, I stand infront of the kettle section and sigh. Those kettles are beautiful. Infact, there is a huge design competition in the culinary world on designing Kettles. When Kettles whistle, I find it utterly adorable. I never knew why till J made that statement. then it hit me. I MUST have been a kettle!

2. I identify with Kettles. They are quirky, chirpy, do-gooders, boiling water and saving the world one tea cup at a time. They don't have any grand illusions about their purpose in life, but yes, they do know how to boil water and take that purpose seriously, whistling merrily. Yes, if you happen to be in a monastery, one will find the whistling annoying but generally Kettles are peaceable blokes. One could do with a lot worse.

I am exactly like that - definitely quirky, not terribly ambitious, and enthusiastic about doing things most people would likely scoff at and find mundane. For example, I like washing dishes. I find that activity most therapeutic. Most people I know, hate that activity but not me, i'm internally whistling while washing dishes. Seeee the connection??

so given that I truly believe that I was indeed a kettle in a monastery and that undoubtedly must have caused the buddhist monks some discomfiture, I figure, I'll do well to simmer down a bit and lie low in this life.

So dear karma, I'm sorry. Give me a break and I promise the whistling will stop.

True Love

When I think about it,

I don't want dinners amidst candles

or

to walk down the aisle in a shower of confetti

or

even pictures of us as shiny happy people.

All I want is that when I look at you,

from across the room,

you get me.

Stuff that should be on my resume but is not..

1. Expert "Fire Fighter"

I'm sooo used to dousing out fires and explosive situations in real life that this is second nature to me. When shit hits the fan, they come to me. Sort of like the character "Wolf" in Pulp Fiction, but without the Lamborghini. (on an aside, I've had to really restrain myself from putting this on my actual resume, its an impressive skill no?)

2. Ability to spot obscure music bands before they eventually make it big

I knew Alicia keys before she was Alicia Keys..apart from her mother ofcourse. Being a music snob, I listen to artists that are out of the mainstream and abandon them after they become mainstream by which time they would have sold out to the whims of music labels anyway! If you don't believe me hit up Janelle Monae and Lisa Hannigan. I'm confident both of them are the next big thing. And ofcourse, willow smith, by virtue of being will smith's daughter. She is the next big little thing. (heh!)

3. Expert *insert any aerobic fitness activity* Dancer

Be it zumba, step or cardio dance fitness sessions, I have the uncanny knack for picking up the routines after watching it just once. yes you heard me right. just once. One will ordinarily not appreciate this talent but come to one of these fitness sessions and when you flail you arms and legs in an uncoordinated manner and look stupid, hit me up! It takes supreme hand-eye coordination, an innate ability to catch rhythm and comprehension of the language of aerobic fitness sessions. What language you ask? you have to know what "single, single, double", "belly dancer", "grapevine" "booty shake" mean to respond quickly and not look like a dork.

4. Charmer Extraordinaire

I say this because I'm a people person and generally can connect with anybody.Yes anybody. Even a hippie in a farmer's market and the dude at the Indian store. The indian-store dude near our house is so taken in by me that he gives me either cream biscuits or a can of Canada Dry (I have no idea why!) everytime I buy something from him.

5. Fashion Connoisseur

I love fashion and I read an obscene amount of fashion blogs to know exactly whats on trend and whats not. I've also become something of an online shopping expert, as in, I want a particular item, lets say sequined skirts, I know which online portal to turn to. I don't have the budget but I yearn for the day when I will. May be I should go after Nina Garcia's job! (smacks head!)

Other notable mentions:

1. Can run 3 miles after eating a heavy burrito

2. Geography whiz - Knows the name of that obscure lake in central asia that looks like a blob.

3. Expert knowledge of African politics including dictators with hard-to-pronounce names

4. Read books by obscure Literature Nobel Prize winners. (Like Naguib Mahfouz. Yes he won. honest!)

5. Online Scrabble Champion - It actually involves a ton of strategy. ok may not a TON but still...

Sadly,

Our love, my love

was strong and delicate.

Was.

Our love, my love

was loud and subtle.

Was.

Our love, my love

Was kind and harsh.

Was.

Now, it's like the fragrance

left behind, when the person is no longer there.

Still there but will fade eventually.

a balanced month

Dear October,

I hate to see you go. I hate to bid you goodbye. You are always the most funnest month of the year for me. Not only because my birthday features in this month, but also because you incorporate so many fun stuff like Halloween, Fall break and End of term parties. But, you being the month of Libra, also strive to balance it with non-fun stuff like Exams, Submission deadlines and interview dings. At the end of your month October, I look back at the crests and troughs and realize that regardless of the events themselves, you do however, keep it exciting.

First, there was my birthday! yay!! Although I had two exams on my birthday this year, I still had fun. I called a bunch of my friends to party with me afterwards. Inspite of having exams the next day, they came to wish me for my birthday. Some got balloons and others bought me drinks. I also got some lovely prezzies! the best part of birthdays no? This year my prezzies included a pair of sooper gorgeous pink heels, powder puff and stuff from bath & body works. At the end of it, I felt happy turning a year older. The best part of it though was the b'day luck - my exams turned out to be ok (I expected to get absolutely mauled given my inadequate preparation) and I got an interview invite (which I later turned down, long story) but still...

Then there was the Fall break which I spent in Seattle. Seattle is such a fun, quirky city. Its right up there as one of my favourite cities in the US. I love cities that have a distinct character. Cities that you adapt to rather than vise-versa. And since I come from a sea-faring family, I loved the salty scent of the ocean that permeates everywhere. There were hippies galore and bars which served a gazillion drinks. I'll always remember stumbling about downtown in a Fernet Branca induced happy daze. oh such good times! I'll also remember this hippie who sold paintings at the pikes place market who gave me a painting gratis because we both had a shared India connection. All he asked in return was a post card from wherever I travelled to next. This is what makes travel so much fun for me - meeting interesting people and having interesting conversations.

And finally, Halloween. You do end it with a bang, don't you October? I'm not so into this holiday as most others but hey, I'll never turn down an opportunity to wear weird outfits and partay!! This year I'm going as a "word-play" costume. Its rather stupid but has the right amount of stupidity to qualify as a Halloween costume.

So October, I'll have to wait for a whole year to meet you again. You're the month that ushers in the bitter cold gently. The month where the leaves are falling but where the sun still shines fat headedly in the sky. That's what I love about your weather - the lazy sunshine. Not so cold, but not so hot either. I'm glad I could still wear my summer outfits in your month. You were very kind to the tropical me.

You kept it real and made it fun. You run a very balanced show indeed!

Au revoir,

Hugs & Kisses,

A

Term 1: Hits & Misses

Hits

1. Loved the courses I took - Managerial Accounting, Marketing of Innovations and French. Whether I did well in them is another matter altogether. I've decided to take up a host of "quant" courses each time, so much so that it looks like my concentration is going to be in Finance and Accounting. How on earth did this happen??

2. Mentoring FYs - Being a Career Fellow and TA was great fun! I gotta meet a lot of FYs and dish out recruiting and academic advice. Yes, I'm an awesome zen advice-giver!! They seem so sorted though! This time last year I was lost and barely getting by!

3. Keeping Fit - Despite it being hectic, managed to do the 3 mile Wa duke trail atleast twice every week. I could still do better but I definitely feel sort of fit which is a huge improvement over last year where I didn't seriously exercise till term 3.

4. Fall Fashion - Managed to dress better to school this fall. My fall wardrobe was a total hit as I got compliments almost everyday! I know this sounds shallow but my moods are influenced by the clothes I wear and so it is very important for me to dress well. My clothes really make me happy!

Misses

1. Recruiting - This blew up on my face as I was too selective in my approach. Compared to the internship search, definitely performed below par in full time recruiting. Sigh, I need to buck up. But you know what, I like my approach. I don't want to end up with a job, I want THE job. Its a huge risk and a long haul but I cannot work on something I'm not psyched about. so lets see. *fingers crossed*

2. Socializing - we had tons of dinners but not enough rad parties! hoping this will change in fall 2

3. Dating - Just not in the frame of mind to date. Its too much - balancing studies, recruiting and dating but there are times when I yearn for someone to hug and tell me its ok. Thats what I miss the most about not being in a relationship and the back rubs and not paying for dinners ..sigh!

4. Reading - I miss reading a good book, even a "management" book for that matter. I started reading Dan Ariely's new book - the upside of irrationality - dealing with "irrational" consumer behaviour. Its very well written and he is funny. but I can't seem to get past page 50 for some reason. If there is one reason I want to find a job quickly, it is to get back to my beloved reading. I feel incomplete without books. I miss the feeling of being wonder struck at every page, of drinking in beautifully composed sentences and wondering why I never thought of things that way. Reading made me feel smart, made me feel like I was growing as person - without it I feel stunted. My new resolve is to read atleast one book a term. Here's to wishful thinking!!

That was term 1 in essence - few hits and misses. Really hoping Fall 2 will end well. God willing!

Jazz > Finals

been hit by a major case of 2nd year senioritis and so am being extremely lax about the impending finals on Monday.

I had decided to be extremely diligent over the weekend and spend every minute studying but things, sadly, haven't gone according to plan. First I woke up at 1 PM today (Massive Fail!!) as a result of end of term partying. 2nd, decided to go to Saladelia, my fav cafe, to study as there was afootball game today, which meant that there would be no parking at school. But at Saladelia, a Jazz band began playing live at 6PM and that brought all my studying to halt. I loved it! especially when they began to improvise on autumn leaves. aaah love Jazz.

So here I am, late on a saturday night desperately trying to salvage my finals. But its looking like a lost cause!

What is love?

...don't hurt me, don't hurt me no more.....

remember that iconic song by Haddaway? remember? We were at a 2Y dinner today, about 20 of us, tucking into an awesome spread that my roommate made, and suddenly this song came on the system, and me a couple of others started singing this song and doing some sort of co-ordinated dance thingy. Fun! I felt like was transported back into the 90s. The best place to be methinks.

So about the dinner, it was a cozy evening and we were all catching up with each other and listening to Year 2 recruiting cautionary tales, when suddenly some FYs barged in drunk as hell. You see, in the same apartment complex, we were also having the "Around The World" Party - a bunch of 10 apartments, each representing a country and its party experience. As a FY last year, I did the country crawl and got hammered drinking sangrias, margaritas, limoncellos, wine, gin and tonic and ultimately, irish car bombs. The after effects weren't pretty but the party was sooper fun. This year though, my heart wasn't in it and I found that a lot of my fellow 2Ys were also giving this a miss.

We are growing up, my 2Y cohort. We are skipping the get-hammered-silly parties and focusing on small cozy dinners instead. Focusing on getting to know each other very well before the time ran out.

Oh well, getting back to the drunk FYs who barged in, we told them they had the wrong apartment and pointed them in the right direction. I, btw, ended up going to the apartment representing Iceland. It was themed like the smirnoff bar, lot of dry ice and white everywhere and they had the AC down to 40!! a good friend of mine was DJing there and played some awesome techno. Very Iceland indeed. I stayed there till the place started filling up with eager FYs looking to get hammered. Thats when I exited.

Sigh, I'm growing up aren't I?

Status Update

In list form:

1. I got a speeding ticket today. Its going to burn a HUGE hole in my pocket. super ouch!

2. but considering I did earn a lot of money teaching accounting and reviewing resumes of FYs, it sort of compensates

3. So... good karma = bad karma. let this be a lesson! also DON'T ever speed.

4. Good friend of mine had a baby. Super cute and so happy. She is going to be the coolest mom ever!

5. Also, 2 exams on my birthday. again, super ouch!

6. Planning to go to the 2nd exam with a bottle of vodka (hey! its my birthday!). My logic - open book, open notes and open bar

7. heh!

8. My schedule for this term is AWESOME. No classes on Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays

9. but I do get sooper effed on Tuesdays and Fridays with back to back classes.

10. not so heh

11. Being extremely languid in my job search. Very bad that.

12. but on the flipside, am making a lot of friends in my class and getting to know a lot of new people.

13. Did trivia at Dains after ages. Did poorly in terms of scores. Poorly by my standards. We beat the undergrad upstarts but still poor

14. Hurts as much as getting a speeding ticket.

15. Actually scratch that. Speeding ticket hurts more. definitely.

16. actually. It depends..

17. New friends also include undergrads from French class.

18. Undergrads are definitely channeling their inner gunner self at the aforementioned French Class.

19. Its sorta annoying but understandable.

20. Reminds me of..well..me

21. They also abuse the use of exclamation marks in their emails/texts!!!!!!!!!!!!!

22. Heh!

23. This is fun!!!!!!

24. ok. will stop.

25. Told you - annoying!

26. Its late and I'm in the mood to quote shakespeare

27. "When sorrows come, they come not single spies, but in battalions." - (Hamlet Quote Act IV, Scene V).

28. "As flies to wanton boys, are we to the gods; they kill us for their sport" - King Lear

29. Oh, I'm such a drama queen. But an eloquent drama queen, C'est ne pas?

30. Au revoir world!

I'm a PC

Just introduced this man to an audience of 500, including the Deans of all grad schools at Duke. Had lunch with him as well. The geek in me is doing major cartwheels!

Campout Crazy!

Yes, I love me some campout!

Its seriously the coolest thing about being a grad student at duke. Campout is a 40 hour sleep-deprivation exercise to see if you really are a serious fan of Duke Basketball and if you do succeed in making it through the weekend - Fri Night to Sun Morning, you do get to win season tickets for all of Duke's home games.

I did it last year and did not sleep a wink over the entire 40 hours. I still remember the sigh of relief and the rush of adrenaline when the GPSC campout committee announced on Sunday morning that the Campout was over and that we - the remaining intrepid fans - had successfully completed campout! Finishing campout is something I'll always be proud about considering I like sleep so much! I'll also cherish it because it made me love Duke Basketball all the more.

I didn't do it this year because of the weather and I was worried about falling ill but I still did go to all the parties and participated in on the general madness. Campout has the best array of parties and what makes it super awesome is the outdoor setting, the smell of barbeque and the plethora of sounds that hit you. Every club literally has an RV area, blasting music.

The most intense party rivalry is between the Latin American Club and the South Asian Club -Indus. I'm happy to say that this time Indus owned the campout party scene although my ILE teamate, who DJ'ed the Latin American party, did a super job in playing some BRILIANT techno music. I love techno music when it comes to clubbing and the DJing that my buddy did was soo top notch, that I felt like was at a club in amsterdam.

Campout is also a great way to get introduced to a plethora of drinking games like Flip Cup, Beer Pong and Slapping the bag. I got hammered at last year's campout although my beer pong abilities improved exponentially. This time though I went easy on the drinking as I had to drive back.

I love the way campout brings us all together. We have this survivor syndrome, where a kinship is built on surving campout. It is not for the faint of heart, it separates the fans from the non-fans. What I like best about campout are those 4am conversations. Desperate to not fall asleep, you end up talking to random people and have the most discerning of conversations. Last time, I remember, talking about Middle East Politics with a Jordanian Grad student.

To see what campout is about, check out this video, but to experience it, you have to be at Duke. GO DUKE!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dLQo_aPTSdE

Monsoon dreaming

The rains in Durham over the past few days have made me crave for the Monsoons, which is strange because I hate rains. I hate what it comes with, atleast in my associations - Traffic Snarls, Power cuts, Gloom..you get the drift. I've never been able to see the rains like most people I know do - liberating, enchanting and hunger inducing.

But weirdly enough, when it started raining incessantly in Durham, in the last few days - it had me craving for that monsoon feeling. I can't define it but its the anticipation of the Monsoons, the effect it has, after a scorching summer. I always looked forward to the first day of the Monsoons. That day in the first week of June, when all of a sudden the earth would smell fantastic, the weather would turn balmy and within moments, the torrent and the awesome force of the Monsoon would pour down.

I don't like rain but I can look at it for hours and catch up with my thoughts. Thats why I like the Monsoons of Mangalore. Its the time to "ponder" during the rains as my grandma put it. She would sit in the courtyard, legs stretched and crossed, keep herself occupied with splitting peas and just watch the rains. Occasionally, she would let slip something like "I once saved a drowning man, when the river flooded."

The Monsoons in the coast are fierce. It would rain continuously for days without respite. The sea would become much fiercer and the people more vary but tranquil. I remember my family was always concerned about losing boats and friends during the season. Since our ancestral house was practically on the beach, my family would get pretty grim fearing the worst. But when it rained, there was nothing one could do but ponder.

Considering how busy I am, I miss that luxury of pondering and just thinking about things instead of being swept away by this tide called B-school, which requires you to act rather than ponder. I miss that.

Dinner was nice

You sit there before me,

your eyes a-twinkle,

and the conversation meanders beautifully,

with good food and drinks galore,

But I sit there, thinking,

You and I are never going to be a whole.

Its sad really.

responder a la questions

Questions I ask myself these days, for instance:

1. Why, as a 2nd year, I'm busier than ever?

Really, why? I thought I'd huffed and puffed and paid my dues in first year and that the 2nd year would be about lounging in the Fox centre or sipping wine by the WaDuke golf course. But no such luck. As usual I committed to more than I could handle and am now going through school in a bleary, sleep deprived daze.

2. I'm sorry, did you opt for French?? Everyday??

In a rush of madness, one that comes with hanging out with some crazy friends, I decided that B-school wasn't challenging enough and that I should opt to learn a new language - in this case French. I'm now signed up for an intro French Course that goes on till December, everyday. I mean EVERYDAY. with Homework!!

I'm actually enjoying this course though. I've always wanted to be fluent in French and this course is perfect to get me there. Although its a ton of work, its a pleasant departure from B-school case mode. Also, it helps me see quite a bit of the university, especially the other graduate schools and the undergrad campus. Duke has a whimsical quality that I absolutely adore. The architecture is gothic and makes you feel like you're in a weird fairy tale. The walk to the Romance Language institute in the morning, taking in the sights of the campus and the crisp morning air, sets me up nicely for the rest of the day. Its a good thing

3. I'm sorry, YOU are a mentor??

Thats the thing about being a 2nd year at Duke. You get thrust with a ton of responsibilities and part of it is mentoring FYs and getting them through their recruiting process. So you help them through their career goals, resumes etc. Its a great way to get to know FYs and give back to the community but its a lot of work. Sigh, and with classes and recruiting and club stuff, things get mighty hectic. I'm also tutoring and so besides concentrating on my current classes, I'm also brushing up on an advanced accounting to teach some FYs. I love accounting and thats why I elected to do it but where's the time. really??

4. Where's the party tonight??

Although, 2nd year is hectic, the party doesn't stop. I think our class has gotten a lot closer. Instead of wild, crazy, parties, I find myself in close gatherings, with good food and wine and sometime even fondue, having deep discussions. Although I must add, I do still enjoy the occasional mindless partying. Campout is coming in 2 weeks and I'm sooper excited about it. There is no feeling the world that captures the essence of campout. Different clubs play their own music all night long, so you find yourself dancing all night to Latin, Indian and Euro tracks. Can't wait for it!!

I like my classes, my activities and all the stuff thats happening around me. I'm not getting my full quota of forty winks but I definitely like being back in school!