The Final Countdown

Here,I am, in the final leg of this 2 year journey called B-school. Only 5 more weeks to go before I graduate and I find myself in the "real" world. I want to say its been so much fun, yada yada but oddly enough B-school has made me more circumspect and (dare I say it) mature, to be able to be trite.

I can't quite put my finger on what within has changed but something in my core has changed. I have had lots of experiences that have shaped my experiences but very rarely have these profoundly impacted my core. But B-school did and so my ambivalence towards the whole thing.

I did give up a lot to be here. My life in my country, my family, my love and my friends. But,on the other hand, I also received a lot - new experiences, new friends, travel..erm "Business Acumen." At the end, I feel like recipient of a zero sum game. A game that extracts a lot of you but oddly enough leaves you richer because of the very extraction. Like what a person finishing a Marathon might feel like, I suppose. Every mile of the Marathon is more painful than the previous one, but on reaching the finish line, there is no trace of the pain. Only a magnanimous sense of achievement and relief.

B-school for me was not all sunshine for me primarily because it caused me to ask myself a series of uncomfortable, existential type questions. And more importantly I opened myself to these questions. Like, "what do I stand for?" or "Should I compromise and aim at getting any job or do go after what I'm passionate about?" and ofcourse, the piece de resistance of all existential quandries, "What AM I passionate about in the first place?"

I knew B-school was going to be the place where I re-calibrated myself. Not many people get the opportunity to do that and so I went about it with a rare resolve. I used these two years to find myself - what my beliefs were, what my passions were and where I wanted to be. I took risks and countless leaps of faith. I stumbled many times, but learned to raise myself up and walk again. I learned what it was like to stare at an abyss and even walked down a depressive spiral or two. I learned about people and how I deal with people. Finally, I learned my personal boundaries - what I would and would not do.

So If you ask me if it was "Fun." I'd say, probably not the best word to describe it. too trite. Now "Metamorphosis" now, that has a great ring to it. I literally feel different from the Me of two years ago. I don't know what changed but something did, at a very profound level.

So,was it worth it then? since we're all in the business (pardon the pun) of cost-benefit analysis and the like, I have only one answer. And I have no ambiguity in answering this.

HELL YEAH!