Saturday, March 22, 2008

Still Rolling

I know what you're thinking...hoping..rather, that this time "Rolling" refers to marijuana and rolling joints and not about that house hunting shit that I was talking about..but..sorry..no, we will go back and dissect that topic even more because guess what? there have been fresh developments. Yes, I have shifted houses AGAIN and now I'm a World Champion House Shifter and boy, can I pack, I can soo pack that I think I should make it a full time occupation.

Turns out that the only thing worse than a single woman house hunting in pune is TWO women house hunting together in pune. This time it’s not the society that is to blame, although it continues to be predictable and be horrendously evil, this time its US - us women. I teamed up with a good friend to go house hunting inspite of already having moved recently because she - the good friend, wanted to move out from her PG and I was feeling all chuffed that I was finally goin to have a cool roomate. I always wanted to have that fantasy roomate. You know where the roomate is this boho-chic, extroverted type, where she'd take the nerd me to all the cool parties- yes THAT roomate. Although this chick wasn't thaat boho and stuff, I was still excited about getting a roomate.

So anyway, we house hunted together and we found a really good deal where the house was all furnished, and for the rent that was being asked, it was as good as MTV CRIBS. So we both were really excited and right when we were about to sign the lease at the broker's, she backed out because, hear this, her "Parents did not want her to move out". This was really it and long story short, I exploded, she exploded, and obviously the friendship exploded and in this combustible mess, I had an epiphany. Actually two. First, most women, if competing for the same prize, HATE each other and second, most women, are actually very weak decision makers.

I’ll explain epiphany two before I lose my last remaining girl friend. I’m not sure if it’s the result of upbringing or self-confidence, but most women I know run all their decisions by their parents. I’ve never seen guys do such a thing but this aspect troubles me. If women can’t decide for themselves how they should live, how they should spend their money, where they should study, what company to work for, no wonder their parents are also decide who their husbands should be. I believe parents are the root cause for this. They bring their girls up on such a tight leash that the girls themselves are unable to take a firm decision without the approval of their parents, in turn feeding the insecurity of the parents with regards to their kids. I think a strong able parent would be one who lets his girl go, one who gives her enough independence to confidently make her own decisions.

Epiphany one is no brainer really. All women HATE each other period. If they are the best of friends today, come tomorrow and they both are competing for the same thing, all bets are off. But then all women tend to take things personally and really can’t look at a situation objectively. Not like men, who can cuss the hell out of each other and can still have a friendly banter on Tendulkar’s batting a moment later. Women hold deadly grudges. I know that because I had a major blow up with almost every woman I know here and it’s true! we all can be quite the bitches.

And suddenly I’m having epiphany three. No wonder I studied Mechanical engineering, where I was pretty much the only girl in the class, No wonder I like working with men more than I do with women, no wonder my closest friends are men, its not other women, its Men! I expect these women to act like men, be independent and fierce like men and it is unfair, given how women are brought up in this country, but I just wish my tribe would be more confident and sure of itself and that sometimes, it's OK to act like men

6 comments:

Abhishek Nag said...

now i know...

Tanushree Baruah said...

I totally agree.

Amrita said...

You Go Gurrrll!!
Yes totally nail-on-the-head that - women can be total bitches, hold grudges and generally think that they are in competition with all other women in one way or another.
Sometimes I think this might encourage the success of all womankind and at other times I feel that it will lead to our downfall!
Yet, I totally agree - and I sympathise cuz ive done it all, roommates (you've met them so you know!!), moving houses, picking up dirty linen.
Good luck sis!

Amrita said...

Just another bit about the last paragraph where you discuss how you want these women to behave like men in being independent and fierce.
I too am more comfortable around men and comfortable around women who are not too 'girly' for the want of a better word. It is just simpler with non-girly women and with guys in general.
I just feel that confidence, independence and free thought and action are an individual right - regardless of gender. It is a sad reality that women don't realise this while men have.

AI said...

Nag: Now that was your horrific A-ha moment :)

Tanushree: How come your profile has been made private. You had a great limerick blog, what happend to that?

Amrita: You are my soul sister hehehe

I agree with you when you say that confidence is an individual right but what troubles me is how most women run all their decisions by their parents/husband while the men out there don't. I'm pretty certain it has to do with how girls in this country are brought up. Made to think that they are weak and fragile beings who don't stand a chance without their mamas and papas

Amrita said...

Hehe - thanks 'soul sistah'!
Yeah, needless to say I agree with you. It is very irritating to meet adults who need to run everything by their parents. It is equally annoying when you meet a guy that does the same - and more annoying still when that guy might one day become the significant other, and the annoyance reaches stages of intolerance when the person is a more than grown adult and yet the umbilican cord remains!!